Bad day, not a bad life.

Been sick the whole day today. Flu, cough, headache and felt light headed a few times. Hahaha. Its really pretty bad. But well, doesn't mean that you're sick you can't cook. So i cooked pasta Hehe

Nights like this, suck. Sitting on my bed, feeling physically drain, thinking about the only thing that has the power to screw me every single time. It has only been close to a week but it feels like it has been forever. As much as i hated to admit, how he didn't bother talking to me still affects me a little. And at the same time, my 'disappearance', obviously didn't affect him at all. As childish as it sounds, sometimes part of me really still wish he cares. 

I hate how i take things so seriously all the time because i always end up being the one who have to clear that pile of shit when people leave. And honestly i'm tired of doing what i've always been doing. At the same time i can't bring myself to do the same to people because i know exactly how they are going to feel if people stop caring or start walking away from their life. 

While i'm bullshitting right now, my eyelids are becoming heavier. HAHA. Shall head to bed now. Goodnight babies ;) 

TGIF, TGIS

Skipped PE today because i woke up late. HAHAH. Don't judge me please, i didn't expect that to happen either. Chances are my alarm did ring but i'm too tired to hear anything. So i woke up at 8:15 and since i'm late i got to walk to school instead of taking my dad's car. When i was on my way, i accidentally walked into a guy. Without looking up, i apologised and wanted to walk away. What he did next was really unexpected. He got really angry, held up his hand and wanted to hit me. Can you imagine my face? I was literally like OMG. Lesson learnt, never use phone while walking. I am so thankful i wasn't being slapped or anything like that.

Was really excited about swee choon with classmates today but skipped it instead because my mum complained about how pack and tired i am these few days. Came home straight after school and took a 3 hours nap, hoping it will as least pay back to the last few nights but woke up to a headache.

Going for a shoot date with cuz and his friend tomorrow. I can't wait! Hehehe. At least thats something that i can do without feeling stress. Seriously wishing there are more nice places where we can shoot because just by thinking where to go is killing more than half my brain cells already. Plus the fact that.. You know, my brain. HAHAHA.

I went to countdown to the day of my birthday just now and there's still 215 days to go. By then, i would have completed my year 0 and be in year 1 already. Can't really think about what's gonna happen because i am really not prepared. And to be honest i may be a little scared to step into year 1. But i know i will survive this. I can do this! Hehehe. Alright, have a good sleep and good day ahead! ;)

Shots

Goodbye and Hello

The first day of 2014 is coming to an end. And being a typical Angela, yes, i AM going to do the new year new life shit. HAHAHA. But before that, i'm just gonna sum up my 2013.

2013 is really different from the previous years. I have met some awesome people, went to some really cool places, attended events that i have never. And one of them happened just on the eve of new year's eve. HAHA. That one was really cool and i don't think i will ever experience it again.
I have gone through ups and downs throughout the whole of last year. Although some of the time had been really shitty and tough, i survived!
To all those people who have taught me a lesson, thank you and to those whom i have hurt, i am really sorry.
Thank you to everyone who have been in my life in 2013. Every single one of you made an impact in me, be it whether it changed me or not.

This year, i'm turning 18. To me, being 18 mean more than just being able to watch some M18 movies in the cinema or being able to walk into a club (although being able to walk into a club is kind of a big thing for me HAHA). Being 18 to me it means to be able to handle things more maturely and to be wiser than before. Though i can't seem to see myself being wiser, i will learn and i will do my best.

2014 is going to be different. I will make it different.

New life to me

Had a super long night. Went town with mum in the morning and then class bbq at pasir ris park after. And it is the first time i actually stayed out for the night.

Yesterday, i made a decision to move on. I know i had been saying that forever. But its different this time. Well it really did feel different for once. And so i declared my new life 2 days before the real one comes. HAHA. I know right. #ShitthatAngelasaysanddoes

It was a drink drank drunk night at the bbq. And of course i regretted drinking that much. Not too much, but never had so much in my life. And i kind of realise that my mindset about getting high and being not sober will make me happy is not quite right. I know its childish and shit. But well, we all experience to learn right. Don't judge. HAHAH

It doesn't matter how much you drink and how drunk you get. Because when you wake up the next day, its still a brand new day and you still got to face it. Yourself.
Last night was indeed yolo. And once is enough.

Because at the end of the day, the only thing we wish for is to have brought joy and laughter in the person's life. 

25th of December

Merry Christmas babies! 

Well, Christmas has always been my favourite festival since everywhere i go i hear Christmas songs see pretty lights ^^

Doesn't matter what day it is. When there are thoughts to be sorted out, it needs to be.

Took me long enough to see things through. Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me. And at this rate of hurting i get, i should probably dig a hole hide in there and never come out. 

Its sad that things are happening this way. Sometimes I choose to believe that whatever that is happening is just in my head. Those thoughts, those feelings and everything. But I know, if it wasn’t for your words, I wouldn’t have held on for so long. A new year is starting very soon and I don’t want to be the same old me clinging onto guys anymore.

The only person who remembers to hug me every time before we part.

All those things that I thought didn’t matter, they do. I thought I could watch you live your life the way you do but still continue to remain where we are but I can’t. Watching you not giving a shit it kills me a little more every single time. No matter what I’ve said before, part of me is as selfish and I still want us to be together. But I know we will never be, for whatever reasons.

Doesn’t really matter anymore, does it? How I feel, how we are, what are we.

Whatever it is, It’s the 25^th of December. Merry Christmas! ^^

As usual.

Had been a pretty long day today. It was kind of.. Bad i guess. With this cramp going on plus the muscle-ache from PE yesterday and the bad night sleep because of that irritating car's alarm from right below my house.

Been thinking a lot, as usual. And i kind of see things a little clearer now. Who cares, who doesn't. And who pretended. But i guess all these don't quite matter anymore. It use to mean a lot to me. Because i thought if i were to keep treating people like how i want to be treated, people will do the same. But i was wrong. It doesn't work that way. People don't treat you nicely and sincerely just because you do. If i were to keep going back to people who don't give a shit and stick through them, at the end of the day i'll be the one getting hurt. Over and over. And after all these shit that i've put myself through, i think i'm pretty much done. I don't have much time and there's only so much that i can do. I got to move on with my life. I have goals, family and friends who really care even though they don't say it. And i know they do because no matter what happens, they are always there. And maybe this is what you do when you truly care. You show them that you will always be there. Its never going to be about words anymore. If you really think that i am important to you, show me that i am.

I'm so tired now i can't even move my arms. Can you imagine how im typing now? Hahah! Gotta go shower and take a nap before starting on my assignments. Feeling like a dog now. Anyways, bye! ^^ Cramps urgh..